Super Soakers don't look like real firearms, because that would be stupid. But the battery-operated ones do look like Warhammer 40,000 bolters. Unfortunately, they're not quite powerful enough to hit a raccoon on a fire escape three stories above the ground.
I am married to a woman who says things like, "On your way back from the grocery store, pick up a Super Soaker to see if we can't squirt the raccoon."
Not because she imagines that it would make the beast move on. Just because she thinks it would be funny.
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